Sloppy to Special Needs
When Jesus called out to his would be disciples, "Come follow me and I will make you fishers of men," I often forget the impact this made on themselves or their family. And as I was reading and pondering this text, something more popped out at me.
It was the sloppiness of dropping it all for the sake of following Jesus. There was an abandon that I have rarely encountered. In fact, I couldn't help but think how often I say, "hold on...just a minute."
These words fall from my mouth to my kids, to Ben and definitely Jesus. The right in front of me seems more safe. The unknown to immerse myself in this spontaneous call to live life like that of a good puddle jump splash seems frivolous. I mean, you're just going to wind up cold & wet.
But, isn't that the case for most life?
I allow far too many distractions, be it the internet or laziness, to get in the way of living life. But, these people we rub shoulders with everyday deserve to be given common courtesies. No, beyond common courtesies--to be given the best we have to offer.
I'm a mama to a special needs child. I don't know if I've ever given myself that title here. Being this little girls mama comes with much joy and a lot of mess. Mealtimes in particular.
She is a go big or go home sort of personality. She always has been. The day we were going to go puddle jumping she whined & dragged her heals the whole time. However, once she got there to see the pools upon pools, she found a glimpse of glory.
Sharing the Table is leaving a space for her. It's a daily reminder to me how I need to offer more grace to this little girl of mine who still has trouble with fine motor tasks, which eating with a fork is one if those.
When Jesus says "Come follow me," I imagine him saying this to me:
Leave the full sink to play with your girls outside. Make mealtime pleasant, encouraging new bites and not fretting over new shirts stained, for these little ones are to inherit the Kingdom of Heaven. They are your people you are fishing for. Abandon the precision in accurately cut vegetables, in order to spend more time talking into the puppy phone with Caprice & watching another faux dance recital. Your table is where I will be, and there is no shame welcome here.
I never imagined I would have a child with special needs, but I know it's God teaching me how to love with a gentle patience that is always welcome.